How to respond when you find out your team didn't want you

[WORLD] Discovering that your team didn’t want you in your role—whether through indirect cues, direct feedback, or internal leaks—can feel like a professional and personal blow. But while such a revelation can spark anxiety and self-doubt, experts say it also presents a pivotal opportunity to reassess leadership approaches, rebuild trust, and create a more cohesive team dynamic.

Facing such a situation head-on, rather than retreating or responding defensively, is critical. Leadership and workplace culture consultants stress that acknowledging the situation, seeking open dialogue, and demonstrating a willingness to change are key to regaining credibility and fostering a healthier team atmosphere.

In many cases, a team’s disapproval stems less from personal animosity and more from a mismatch in expectations or leadership styles. Miscommunication, inconsistent direction, or perceptions of favoritism can quickly erode trust. According to Gallup’s 2023 State of the Workplace report, only 23% of employees strongly agree they trust their organization’s leadership—underscoring the fragile nature of internal confidence.

One of the most common triggers for team dissatisfaction is a sudden or unexpected change in leadership. When a manager or team lead is appointed without transparency or team involvement, it can lead to resentment or feelings of powerlessness. In such cases, the new leader must recognize the emotional impact of the transition and take proactive steps to win over skeptics. Hosting listening sessions, acknowledging the discomfort, and clarifying shared goals can help recalibrate the team’s outlook.

Psychologists also point to the concept of "perceived fairness" as a major factor in team harmony. When employees believe decisions—such as promotions, recognition, or task assignments—are made arbitrarily or with bias, they are more likely to withhold trust from leadership. A 2022 SHRM study found that employees who perceive fairness in their workplace are 2.5 times more likely to be satisfied in their roles and 3.1 times more likely to feel respected by colleagues.

Opening Lines of Communication

One-on-one meetings with team members provide a safe space for airing concerns. These conversations shouldn’t be used to defend past actions, but rather to understand pain points and collect honest feedback. Managers are encouraged to ask open-ended questions like, “What do you need from me to succeed?” and “What do you feel is missing in our collaboration?” The goal is not just to listen, but to act meaningfully on what’s heard.

It’s equally important to recognize non-verbal signals of disengagement. A team that avoids communication, delays responses, or withdraws from collaboration is likely sending a message. Leadership consultants suggest implementing anonymous surveys or suggestion boxes to give team members a lower-stakes way of expressing concerns. This can help surface issues that individuals might hesitate to raise directly.

In some cases, the root of the issue may not be internal at all. External pressures—such as high workloads, lack of resources, or organizational instability—can fuel team frustration that becomes unfairly directed at immediate leaders. Understanding the broader workplace ecosystem allows managers to advocate for their teams more effectively and deflect misplaced tension.

Taking Action to Rebuild Trust

Action is more powerful than intention. After gathering insights, leaders must show that change is possible. Whether it's adjusting workflows, offering more clarity in communication, or being more available for support, visible efforts go a long way in reshaping perceptions. Over time, consistent behavior aligned with team values can earn back the respect and cooperation that may have been lost.

Organizations also play a critical role in supporting leaders through these challenges. HR departments should offer conflict-resolution training, leadership coaching, and peer support networks to ensure managers are not navigating these situations in isolation. Creating an environment where feedback—both from and to leadership—is normalized can prevent issues from festering.

Discovering your team didn’t initially support your leadership may sting, but it is not a career death sentence. With humility, clear communication, and a plan of action, managers can shift narratives and forge stronger, more resilient teams. Every challenge is an opportunity to lead—not just by title, but by trust.